"Only when we are no longer afraid do we begin to live."

Fear. It grips me like a predator clutching its prey. I can scream, thrash and carry on about how I hate it, but it keeps it's jaws implanted into my thoughts. For as long as I can remember I've never been able to handle its effect on me. From the time when I was a child until even now. Sometimes I don't even know I'm afraid until after I missed the event.

For me, fear comes in many shapes and sizes. It can be as simple as a fear of heights, flying or someone who I feel has power over me. It tends to make me back down, become passive-aggressive and wilt from the things I want to do or enjoy. Thus I continue to conclude that I do not handle my fears very well.

A month or so ago I heard about a book called, Unleash the Warrior Within. Now I'm not a huge promoter of self-help books, but the interview on the radio got me thinking that I could really understand and use this book to help me accomplish the things in my life. So I bought it last week.

Right now I'm to about page 90. And I have to say that I'm impressed. If you check the book out, you have to realize the author is an ex-Navy SEAL. He started his own form of martial arts and everything has a military edge to it. He doesn't talk down or make you examine the way you are, rather he is giving advice on how to change your life so you can focus on the things you want and thus make you happy.

Fear is a nasty weapon in both physical and emotional states. Somehow I have to overcome my fears so I can produce the life I really want, because I know I'm letting it slip away.

****************************************

Its been a tough week, I've been through a lot of shit both good and bad. I know a few people pop in and out of this blog and it makes me happy to see a few do stay in touch to see what I'm up too. I've struggled with what I should be putting on here. It tends to be a personal journal entry rather than informative, entertainment or whatever else pass for blogs these days. So I'm often reluctant to post since it turns into a lethargic entry about what I'm dealing with in my head.

Thanks for dropping in Kat and Etain. I have to admit that I can't place exactly who you are Etain, but I'd like to find out. Anyways if you do drop by from time to time and want me to post more, let me know. If not no worries.

cya laterz
moi