Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Another legend has passed away... Arthur C. Clarke he was 90 years old. For those of you who don't know he wrote the book that was the basis for the movie: 2001.
I've read a few of his things, but I'm not that huge into Science Fiction as I am into Fantasy, but I do like it. I think as my mind matures a bit more I'll try to get deeper into it. The problem with a lot of the SF is that the characters are lacking and the science is way too deep. Instead of driving the story with the 'people', many old time SF'ers use science as the tool.
Then again what the hell do I know. I'm floundering with my own life and haven't had anything published in years and haven't really written anything of note in about the same time period.
Since no one is really visiting this it don't matter anyways.
cya laterz
moi
I've read a few of his things, but I'm not that huge into Science Fiction as I am into Fantasy, but I do like it. I think as my mind matures a bit more I'll try to get deeper into it. The problem with a lot of the SF is that the characters are lacking and the science is way too deep. Instead of driving the story with the 'people', many old time SF'ers use science as the tool.
Then again what the hell do I know. I'm floundering with my own life and haven't had anything published in years and haven't really written anything of note in about the same time period.
Since no one is really visiting this it don't matter anyways.
cya laterz
moi
Monday, March 10, 2008
Nocturnal Delights (a quick musing)
If she hadn’t come into the room I wouldn’t still be thinking about her while I’m trying to sleep. All of this tossing and turning is driving me nuts. I’ve tried to think about work, cars and even hummed a few lines of my favorite songs, but she appears around every corner of my mind.
My body reacts as if she was right next to me. My breathing slows as I feel her long dark hair brush against my shoulder as she turns her back to me and leans back so I can feel the curve of her body against my chest and stomach. I close my eyes and inhale. A mix of sweet perfume and a hint of vanilla wanders up into my nose. The scent is beyond intoxicating. I realize then I’m stroking myself.
I can’t stop. It’s the third time tonight I’ve repeated this performance. Each time she appeared next to me the fantasy is different. The sex I perceive that we have is all about pleasuring her. Don’t get me wrong I’m beyond turned on, both in and out of the fantasy I’m having. I’ve already had to get up and clean my hands twice and it looks like it will be a third time as well.
I tried to tell myself she isn’t as perfect as I’m making her out to be, but her voice still sings in my ears. You might scoff at the idea that we didn’t get past more than the usual pleasant greetings, but it was the joy in her voice that had me at the top of my toes.
The party was typical. Music played louder than anyone could really talk over. A cheap keg that kept most of the guys happy, but really nothing for me to drink unless I went and got my own. The house warming was full of many people I didn’t know so I hung around the three or four I did know. We sat around the dining room table slinging stories about the people who hadn’t or wouldn’t show up. I don’t remember the time, but she came with a small group. I didn’t know any of them, but Greg our fearless host and welcomed to his home. They offered him some small token of a house warming gift and either shook his hand or he gave the women a quick hug in friendship. That was when I saw her for the first time and the rest of the evening was a blur.
The funny thing is that I don’t even remember her name. We were introduced, but I was lost in her dark eyes. She held out her hand and I’m sure I grasped it like a cold wet towel. She slipped three manicured fingers in between my thumb and forefinger and we gave each other the quick shake. It took everything in me not to grab her and kiss her right there, but I remained cool and said something witty. I’m not sure what I said exactly, but she politely laughed and turned to the next person Greg introduced her to.
They walked out of the dining room and into the kitchen and I began to follow them. I tried to be covert. But by the end of the night, I think she realized I was hanging around her. Now that I think about it, she probably thought I was stalking her.
She wore a black strapless dress that stopped just above her knees. I’m a sucker for soft, long legs and hers begged to be stroked. Her breasts kept the dress from falling down, but they didn’t distract from the rest of her luscious body. In fact, her body curved like a sleepy river, not too fast and not too slow. Nothing seemed out of place and in fact, she did a great job of putting herself together that when she walked it all moved in concert.
I realize I stopped rubbing myself. I hadn’t finished the job, but the evenings encounter was savored like a fine wine. The ambiance of her presence even distracts myself from pleasuring myself while she is in my presence. But then again with her naked backside titillating my hardness it doesn’t take long to get going again. Especially when I don’t expect her to reach around and grasp me to slide me between her legs and let me feel how wet she is again. I don’t know how I can contain myself again. You’ll have to excuse me, this beautiful woman wants me again and I don’t want to miss the experience. I guess I’ll have to get up a third time tonight to clean myself up.Wednesday, March 05, 2008
D&D
If you are a geek/nerd you know who passed away recently. While most of Wisconsin mourned the loss of Brett Favre, my surprise was interrupted by the passing of Gary Gygax.
While I enjoy football and I had hoped the Packers had gotten to the Super Bowl, my reaction to Mr. Gygax's death reached deeper into my soul. My geekness really started with the purchase of my D&D books in the late 70's. I remember as if it was yesterday....
My mother went to the doctor quite a bit as I grew up. During one of these trips we stopped at a craft shop where most times I was bored out of my mind. Way in the back was a hobby section and I found a rack of books. I read through the covers and I realized this was a game I could relate too. I convinced my mother I needed to buy these books. I bought the Player's Guide and the Dungeon Master's Guide. I had no knowledge how I could play, but I knew these books would unlock a deeper part of my subconscious than anything else I had ever played.
I read through the books and thought they were great and I couldn't wait to begin to play. I bought a couple of modules and rolled up a couple of characters. Not only was I the DM, but I created the characters trying to kill lizard men and kobolds. I couldn't get enough dice, modules and books I easily became addicted to this game. However, I was missing something. A group of guys where the game would really become fascinating.
I fell into a group of like-minded guys at school. I think it was sort of one of those things that the four of us were interested in computers, sci-fi movies and books that playing D&D was a natural progression. Going to high school became my geekfest. I started to collect comic books (argued about plots), designed computer games and spent weekends playing D&D. My first character ('Xexuse' pronounced X-zuse) was my hero. When the group wasn't playing I'd spend hours re-writing my character sheet, look up magical items in the books I wanted to collect and jotting down his personal history. Sad as it sounds, he also became one of my friends.
For the next ten years or so, other RPG's came into my life and D&D sort of fell by the wayside as we played Rolemaster, Traveller, Car Wars, and other P&P games. Our diet consisted of Doritios and Mountain Dew these were the staples of our playing. Two bags of chips and two 12 packs of Dew. I think the game had tie-ins to those companies as anyone who played D&D ate and drank the same thing....How did that come to be? I never saw the memo or read it in a magazine that D&D required Doritios and Dew....must have been the letters.....
In my recent posts about the Internet about my gaming and such it all started with that simple game. I often wish I could find a group and play again. In the article mentioned above, it was noted that GG continued to play his game until January. That's so cool...
RIP GG!
cya laterz,
moi
While I enjoy football and I had hoped the Packers had gotten to the Super Bowl, my reaction to Mr. Gygax's death reached deeper into my soul. My geekness really started with the purchase of my D&D books in the late 70's. I remember as if it was yesterday....
My mother went to the doctor quite a bit as I grew up. During one of these trips we stopped at a craft shop where most times I was bored out of my mind. Way in the back was a hobby section and I found a rack of books. I read through the covers and I realized this was a game I could relate too. I convinced my mother I needed to buy these books. I bought the Player's Guide and the Dungeon Master's Guide. I had no knowledge how I could play, but I knew these books would unlock a deeper part of my subconscious than anything else I had ever played.
I read through the books and thought they were great and I couldn't wait to begin to play. I bought a couple of modules and rolled up a couple of characters. Not only was I the DM, but I created the characters trying to kill lizard men and kobolds. I couldn't get enough dice, modules and books I easily became addicted to this game. However, I was missing something. A group of guys where the game would really become fascinating.
I fell into a group of like-minded guys at school. I think it was sort of one of those things that the four of us were interested in computers, sci-fi movies and books that playing D&D was a natural progression. Going to high school became my geekfest. I started to collect comic books (argued about plots), designed computer games and spent weekends playing D&D. My first character ('Xexuse' pronounced X-zuse) was my hero. When the group wasn't playing I'd spend hours re-writing my character sheet, look up magical items in the books I wanted to collect and jotting down his personal history. Sad as it sounds, he also became one of my friends.
For the next ten years or so, other RPG's came into my life and D&D sort of fell by the wayside as we played Rolemaster, Traveller, Car Wars, and other P&P games. Our diet consisted of Doritios and Mountain Dew these were the staples of our playing. Two bags of chips and two 12 packs of Dew. I think the game had tie-ins to those companies as anyone who played D&D ate and drank the same thing....How did that come to be? I never saw the memo or read it in a magazine that D&D required Doritios and Dew....must have been the letters.....
In my recent posts about the Internet about my gaming and such it all started with that simple game. I often wish I could find a group and play again. In the article mentioned above, it was noted that GG continued to play his game until January. That's so cool...
RIP GG!
cya laterz,
moi
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
My Internet Life...
What has gotten into me this month? Three postings? That has to be a new record or something. I'm not even sure why I keep this up. I suppose it is to keep connected with some fabulous people I've encountered over the past ten years or so...
Maybe it was longer than that....
My internet experience started back before there were these things called browsers. You had to type Unix commands to access sites. But I wasn't interested in the growth of the internet I was only on to play a MUD! I sat in front of my monochrome monitor on my little 286 computer making my way through the zones and player killings of (insert tense music, 'dun, dun, dun'), The Final Challenge. In this little universe I came up with my two most favorite MMRPG and Internet handles, (Triston and Venthor). I was the first evil character to ever max out on a multi-classed character (level 50 or 30-30-30). While I wasn't one of the first people to play that mud, I certainly was in the very early stages of the mud. I haven't played much, but a few years ago I did have the opportunity to go to a few get-togethers down in Chicago. Those were a blast.
Since I'm pretty much a geek, this whole internet thing fascinated me. I heard you could use pictures and stuff. So I left the command line world and found myself inside a browser. I don't remember which browser I lost my internet virginity on, but I found myself wanting more and more. Hell I even found my job at Trek through the internet.
I never got pulled into the sub-culture of the web. I tried to stay inside of windows and its programming as I hopped from job to job. I always dabbed in web programming, downloaded a few napster songs back in the day and found lots of pictures of nakkid women. Ah the age of information at my fingertips was exciting.
Then EverQuest came along and I got sucked back into playing an on-line game. This game enthralled me the first time I picked up the box at the store. It was everything I dreamed about when I was 15 and playing dungeon and dragons (old school style...paper, pencils and imagination). The graphics wowed me (no pun intended). I ate the game up and it consumed me worse than any other game in history. And I met even more amazing people in that game. I also met the one woman who got away. But I would never trade that time I spent with her and I owe that game to being able to meet Mic. And there were other people who I became closely connected too. Spending hours waiting for things to appear or to fight through dungeons has a way of bring people together. But people move on and lives change in time. Some people were smart and gave the game up knowing that their lives were consumed by a virtual world. I hung on. Not to really play the game, but to stay close to those I cared about.
After I got divorced I think the game became less important to me. I found myself happy with who I was and I changed some things about what I was. My career became more important than trying to level a cartoon. I tried to start relationships. I failed, but I tried. I made a few mistakes because I wasn't patient, but I learned from it all. (I still wasn't getting enough sex. Maybe it was all the computer games I was(am) playing. Nah.....)
And of course there was World of Warcraft. While I enjoyed the game, it never became what TFC or EQ did. I spent my fair share of time there. Met some nice people, but I never allowed anyone there to get too close. I tried to keep it what it was...a game.
Now I'm working for a company and I'm the Lead Programmer in designing an Intranet Web Application. It is pretty cutting edge stuff. While the project managers have no clue on how to manage a project like this, it is exciting to see what we are trying to make a web site (browsers, data base and such do...).
Now I've become the geeky hands on nerd of the web. I know more than I ever thought on putting together a web application. Oh, I dabbled and 'knew' enough to put together some light-weight web pages together, but this is different. I hope I can convince the people I work for that I know what I'm doing and they should listen, but when they write the paychecks you let them direct the traffic to a certain point.
However something in the future scares me. Conan...it looks freakin' cool. But who has time to play that? By the way, I've finally mastered a few 'expert' songs in Rock Band...
I have a feeling when I'm in my retirement home. I'll be the only one there still playing video games. I'm such a ner...geek.
cya laterz
moi
Maybe it was longer than that....
My internet experience started back before there were these things called browsers. You had to type Unix commands to access sites. But I wasn't interested in the growth of the internet I was only on to play a MUD! I sat in front of my monochrome monitor on my little 286 computer making my way through the zones and player killings of (insert tense music, 'dun, dun, dun'), The Final Challenge. In this little universe I came up with my two most favorite MMRPG and Internet handles, (Triston and Venthor). I was the first evil character to ever max out on a multi-classed character (level 50 or 30-30-30). While I wasn't one of the first people to play that mud, I certainly was in the very early stages of the mud. I haven't played much, but a few years ago I did have the opportunity to go to a few get-togethers down in Chicago. Those were a blast.
Since I'm pretty much a geek, this whole internet thing fascinated me. I heard you could use pictures and stuff. So I left the command line world and found myself inside a browser. I don't remember which browser I lost my internet virginity on, but I found myself wanting more and more. Hell I even found my job at Trek through the internet.
I never got pulled into the sub-culture of the web. I tried to stay inside of windows and its programming as I hopped from job to job. I always dabbed in web programming, downloaded a few napster songs back in the day and found lots of pictures of nakkid women. Ah the age of information at my fingertips was exciting.
Then EverQuest came along and I got sucked back into playing an on-line game. This game enthralled me the first time I picked up the box at the store. It was everything I dreamed about when I was 15 and playing dungeon and dragons (old school style...paper, pencils and imagination). The graphics wowed me (no pun intended). I ate the game up and it consumed me worse than any other game in history. And I met even more amazing people in that game. I also met the one woman who got away. But I would never trade that time I spent with her and I owe that game to being able to meet Mic. And there were other people who I became closely connected too. Spending hours waiting for things to appear or to fight through dungeons has a way of bring people together. But people move on and lives change in time. Some people were smart and gave the game up knowing that their lives were consumed by a virtual world. I hung on. Not to really play the game, but to stay close to those I cared about.
After I got divorced I think the game became less important to me. I found myself happy with who I was and I changed some things about what I was. My career became more important than trying to level a cartoon. I tried to start relationships. I failed, but I tried. I made a few mistakes because I wasn't patient, but I learned from it all. (I still wasn't getting enough sex. Maybe it was all the computer games I was(am) playing. Nah.....)
And of course there was World of Warcraft. While I enjoyed the game, it never became what TFC or EQ did. I spent my fair share of time there. Met some nice people, but I never allowed anyone there to get too close. I tried to keep it what it was...a game.
Now I'm working for a company and I'm the Lead Programmer in designing an Intranet Web Application. It is pretty cutting edge stuff. While the project managers have no clue on how to manage a project like this, it is exciting to see what we are trying to make a web site (browsers, data base and such do...).
Now I've become the geeky hands on nerd of the web. I know more than I ever thought on putting together a web application. Oh, I dabbled and 'knew' enough to put together some light-weight web pages together, but this is different. I hope I can convince the people I work for that I know what I'm doing and they should listen, but when they write the paychecks you let them direct the traffic to a certain point.
However something in the future scares me. Conan...it looks freakin' cool. But who has time to play that? By the way, I've finally mastered a few 'expert' songs in Rock Band...
I have a feeling when I'm in my retirement home. I'll be the only one there still playing video games. I'm such a ner...geek.
cya laterz
moi
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Hell week
From every direction, from every experience this past week was hell. To even begin to describe it would call forth demons from the underworld to laugh and mock at my misery. I'd start to complain about work and personal life, but I already hear the cackling of the evil beasts lurking in the background, so suffice it to say it sucked.
How do you turn a bad time/situation around? Without taking a header into a brick wall that is, because while the pain might feel 'good' I don't think that is an ever lasting solution. I think the best way is to surround yourself with friends. Only certain kinds of friends will do, because those at work will only remind you of the turmoil you are constantly facing. The only kinds of friends that can get you out of a terrible set of circumstances are those who can make you laugh and feel good.
These friends are the ones you want to hang around with anyways. It is quite possibly the reason your week has been so terrible. Which usually leads to your significant other. If this person is giving you shit, chances are you cannot escape your problems. What do you do then? You need to explore your circle of friends that you two are mutually friends with. Why? Because if you go hang out with your friend(s) you are tempted to 'talk up' the problems you are having with that person. Since they are with you and it would cause a relationship faux pas to bitch about that person within earshot. Even if you didn't think so, the hell you thought you were living with will get worse.
So you've excluded your partner, your co-workers and your exclusive friends it leaves those who know both of you and that can have some fun. I don't think it creates a blissful existence, but a window of time exists where you can forget about your troubles. It may even give you a shove off in the right direction as you glean that maybe the problems you are having don't seem to be as bad as you first thought.
Or you can come home after a few hours and realize that not only does your life suck, but it's worse than you thought.
cya laterz
moi
How do you turn a bad time/situation around? Without taking a header into a brick wall that is, because while the pain might feel 'good' I don't think that is an ever lasting solution. I think the best way is to surround yourself with friends. Only certain kinds of friends will do, because those at work will only remind you of the turmoil you are constantly facing. The only kinds of friends that can get you out of a terrible set of circumstances are those who can make you laugh and feel good.
These friends are the ones you want to hang around with anyways. It is quite possibly the reason your week has been so terrible. Which usually leads to your significant other. If this person is giving you shit, chances are you cannot escape your problems. What do you do then? You need to explore your circle of friends that you two are mutually friends with. Why? Because if you go hang out with your friend(s) you are tempted to 'talk up' the problems you are having with that person. Since they are with you and it would cause a relationship faux pas to bitch about that person within earshot. Even if you didn't think so, the hell you thought you were living with will get worse.
So you've excluded your partner, your co-workers and your exclusive friends it leaves those who know both of you and that can have some fun. I don't think it creates a blissful existence, but a window of time exists where you can forget about your troubles. It may even give you a shove off in the right direction as you glean that maybe the problems you are having don't seem to be as bad as you first thought.
Or you can come home after a few hours and realize that not only does your life suck, but it's worse than you thought.
cya laterz
moi
Thursday, February 14, 2008
V-day
So it's that day. The dreaded day that never seems to work out for me. No matter what I do or how romantic I am I seem to fall flat on my face. Sometimes I'm chasing the wrong woman and no matter what I do, it isn't enough. Or it could be possibly I'm with someone, but I always expect more than I get. That is probably my fault not hers.
I've thought more about writing something serious again. However, work is so overwhelming I don't have time to sleep let alone anything else. I hope this is all worth it. I won't bore you with the details, because its just more work on top of other work. The problem is by the time I come home I don't want to do anything creative. I'm beyond spent. I don't think I've worked less than 60 hours a week since September. Okay, maybe the two weeks around Christmas and New Years were a bit less. Still I've been on a killer pace every other week.
How have your V-day's been? Are you ready to run off to Key West with me yet? Not that I'd get much interest, but it is a usual thought in the back of my mine. Espcially this winter. It has sucked!!!
Speaking of running away...I wonder what type of woman I would want to escape with. A woman with a bit of age around the corners who can't get enough of sex. Or a 20 something young woman who can't stop, full of energy and of course can't get enough sex. I sense a theme here. Maybe its that last condition, despite age or much anything else. I've always thought that if I did something like that. I'd get cursed with a ding-bat that can't think of anything but herself. A strange curse, a beautiful woman who intelliectually could give a box of rocks a run for the money.
Did I say I'm tired of winter yet???
Well time for this drive by post to sputter by...
cya
laterz
I've thought more about writing something serious again. However, work is so overwhelming I don't have time to sleep let alone anything else. I hope this is all worth it. I won't bore you with the details, because its just more work on top of other work. The problem is by the time I come home I don't want to do anything creative. I'm beyond spent. I don't think I've worked less than 60 hours a week since September. Okay, maybe the two weeks around Christmas and New Years were a bit less. Still I've been on a killer pace every other week.
How have your V-day's been? Are you ready to run off to Key West with me yet? Not that I'd get much interest, but it is a usual thought in the back of my mine. Espcially this winter. It has sucked!!!
Speaking of running away...I wonder what type of woman I would want to escape with. A woman with a bit of age around the corners who can't get enough of sex. Or a 20 something young woman who can't stop, full of energy and of course can't get enough sex. I sense a theme here. Maybe its that last condition, despite age or much anything else. I've always thought that if I did something like that. I'd get cursed with a ding-bat that can't think of anything but herself. A strange curse, a beautiful woman who intelliectually could give a box of rocks a run for the money.
Did I say I'm tired of winter yet???
Well time for this drive by post to sputter by...
cya
laterz
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Sex streak
One thing I was wondering is the longest consecutive streak of continuous days of having sex. Of course there would have to be some stipulations, because sex is such an ambiguous term. I'm defining it as intercourse because it requires the most physical toils on both the man on the woman. Oral sex is usually one-sided. While masturbation is well, usually with yourself (although it can be fun...but that's a different topic).
I think 8 days in a row is my record, but I'm not sure. There was once this time with this woman (yes I remember her name, but not the exact details), where we had gobs of sex, but I'm not sure if it was everyday. I guess I should also add that the sex has to be with the same person. I mean...ew gross...if it was multiple partners over a long stretch.
Since most women get their visitor every 28 days or so, I would think that would be their limit. The women I've known that period of time is off-limits. (Excuse the bad pun.) Would anyone, especially a woman want to have sex that often? Would that make them a sex-fiend? And what would anybody say if you counted the number of times during that time? So if someone had sex twice or thrice a day for two weeks straight. Is that even possible? And if so, where is she? Heh.
On average though I bet couples have it once a week, less possibly if you have young kids. Sometimes life makes it so you just can't get wild and nekkid any time you want. Which is a damn shame.
I doubt anyone will share, but it would be interesting to know what is your longest active sex streak?
And btw Kat, any man would be lucky to even know you let alone be able to share your life. If they don't it is their fault not yours! Box of rocks....silly girl!
cya laterz
moi
I think 8 days in a row is my record, but I'm not sure. There was once this time with this woman (yes I remember her name, but not the exact details), where we had gobs of sex, but I'm not sure if it was everyday. I guess I should also add that the sex has to be with the same person. I mean...ew gross...if it was multiple partners over a long stretch.
Since most women get their visitor every 28 days or so, I would think that would be their limit. The women I've known that period of time is off-limits. (Excuse the bad pun.) Would anyone, especially a woman want to have sex that often? Would that make them a sex-fiend? And what would anybody say if you counted the number of times during that time? So if someone had sex twice or thrice a day for two weeks straight. Is that even possible? And if so, where is she? Heh.
On average though I bet couples have it once a week, less possibly if you have young kids. Sometimes life makes it so you just can't get wild and nekkid any time you want. Which is a damn shame.
I doubt anyone will share, but it would be interesting to know what is your longest active sex streak?
And btw Kat, any man would be lucky to even know you let alone be able to share your life. If they don't it is their fault not yours! Box of rocks....silly girl!
cya laterz
moi
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Happy B-Lated XMAS/NEW YEAR
Here I am once again. I've skipped past Christmas and breezed through New Year without updating my blog. I'm such a bad boy! Oh yes you should spank me!! Er...I'm getting a HEAD of myself. Yet again I'm bad (eg).
Christmas was nice. PS3 with Rock Band, although I wish I would have gotten the 360 version of it so I could use the Guitar Hero guitars with it. Sony has the patch, but they can't release it. Once they do I'll get one I suspect. I have lots of fun drumming. I've actually gotten further with the guitar, but the drums are a nicer challenge. In reality I got the PS3 more for the Blu-Ray player than anything else, but since you can play games on it as well. I said, what the fuck. Right?
I haven't had much of a chance to do much of anything since work has been increasing over the past few months. When I needed work last year I couldn't find it and now I can't stop it from coming in. I guess that is good (extra money is always nice I suppose).
I'm still sex crazed and lack the ability to quench my dangerous desires, but that will continue to happen until the day I die. I'm sometimes scared I'll do something moderately dangerous and get myself in some trouble, but hey isn't that what life is about (living on the edge?). However now that I'm *gasp* older I doubt I'll ever go through with some of my dangerous (albeit evil/sensuous) thoughts. I think if I get rich in the next 5 years of so, I'm going to find me a wild 20 year old that will need to keep up with me. Heh. I'd end up finding one that is as dumb as a box of rocks and be bored anyways.
Well I need to get my asp.net stuff figured out yet today. Maybe some day soon I'll actually write something worthwhile again. Yeah right.
cya laterz
Christmas was nice. PS3 with Rock Band, although I wish I would have gotten the 360 version of it so I could use the Guitar Hero guitars with it. Sony has the patch, but they can't release it. Once they do I'll get one I suspect. I have lots of fun drumming. I've actually gotten further with the guitar, but the drums are a nicer challenge. In reality I got the PS3 more for the Blu-Ray player than anything else, but since you can play games on it as well. I said, what the fuck. Right?
I haven't had much of a chance to do much of anything since work has been increasing over the past few months. When I needed work last year I couldn't find it and now I can't stop it from coming in. I guess that is good (extra money is always nice I suppose).
I'm still sex crazed and lack the ability to quench my dangerous desires, but that will continue to happen until the day I die. I'm sometimes scared I'll do something moderately dangerous and get myself in some trouble, but hey isn't that what life is about (living on the edge?). However now that I'm *gasp* older I doubt I'll ever go through with some of my dangerous (albeit evil/sensuous) thoughts. I think if I get rich in the next 5 years of so, I'm going to find me a wild 20 year old that will need to keep up with me. Heh. I'd end up finding one that is as dumb as a box of rocks and be bored anyways.
Well I need to get my asp.net stuff figured out yet today. Maybe some day soon I'll actually write something worthwhile again. Yeah right.
cya laterz
Wednesday, November 28, 2007
Wow
I can't believe that it is almost December and I haven't posted in like forever. I doubt anyone checks this site anymore. I mean would I, if I didn't expect it to be updated at least once in a while? Probably not. I guess life makes it difficult to keep doing this. It isn't that I don't want too, but so much time is put into doing the responsibility kind of things that by the end of the day, I'm not wanting to think much.
Still it isn't an excuse. I'm bad at keeping this I suppose. All the good intentions would be the catch phrase I would use to describe it, but still it isn't enough. You've got to do it.
I'd really would like to start writing seriously again. But that isn't going to happen any time soon I fear. I've have a regular job once again that demands 45 or so hours a week, plus I'm still doing my own company on the side which is getting busy again. Right now I've been averaging about 70ish hours a week. It gets pretty exhausting. My brain wants to turn off and do stupid things like play the 360, Lotro or even Wow. I've given up on WoW since I really can't compete with raiding and stuff. I'm looking forward to Conan-online but who knows about that.
I should go. I'd promise to write more, but who are we kidding. I'll try not to be so distant. I miss all of you who have read this. I wish we could talk on a regular basis. If you have an IM name send it to me and I'll look for you. I have it on @ work.
cya laterz
moi
Still it isn't an excuse. I'm bad at keeping this I suppose. All the good intentions would be the catch phrase I would use to describe it, but still it isn't enough. You've got to do it.
I'd really would like to start writing seriously again. But that isn't going to happen any time soon I fear. I've have a regular job once again that demands 45 or so hours a week, plus I'm still doing my own company on the side which is getting busy again. Right now I've been averaging about 70ish hours a week. It gets pretty exhausting. My brain wants to turn off and do stupid things like play the 360, Lotro or even Wow. I've given up on WoW since I really can't compete with raiding and stuff. I'm looking forward to Conan-online but who knows about that.
I should go. I'd promise to write more, but who are we kidding. I'll try not to be so distant. I miss all of you who have read this. I wish we could talk on a regular basis. If you have an IM name send it to me and I'll look for you. I have it on @ work.
cya laterz
moi
Monday, October 22, 2007
Whew...
Life has been hell these past few months.
I've been working steady 60 hour weeks since Labor Day. Two weeks ago I had to scramble around for some Packers (Football tickets) for my son and I to attend a game. And then this past weekend I had to get the house ready for a going to Iraq party for him. That meant repainting most of the house and steam cleaning the floors.
It was all worth it. About 25-30 people showed to send him off. He deploys at the end of next month. Its strange to see my grown son going through all of this stuff. It uses to be that many of his memories I shared with him. Since he has been in the Army for the past year and a bit, he has so many experiences I can't really relate too since I've never been in that situation.
Its weird how they get older how much they are the same child you've always known, but they are growing into their own selves even more so as they venture into this huge world.
All of this has eaten up most of my life. I still carry the same issues: Not enough sex...need more sex...want more sex...and I sometimes just want to fuck. But those are standard issues you've all read before. I think I'm a bit crazy in that department. I was thinking about this the other day about how the simplest of things can really turn me on. I often wonder if it is as common with other men.
The way a woman smells can really drive me wild. Not just perfume, but the usual scent they prefer. I believe researchers relate it back to memory, but damn it gets me wild. I love the softness of a woman's skin. Its almost like silk. My hand can brush up against her arm or leg and I've gone from 0 to 60 in the amount of time my hand starts touching until my brain realizes how soft she is. Sometimes its the way she says my name or the glint in her eyes. And as I've been reminded by many, a small breeze from the south can get me going. I guess it doesn't take me much.
TTFN
cya,
laterz
I've been working steady 60 hour weeks since Labor Day. Two weeks ago I had to scramble around for some Packers (Football tickets) for my son and I to attend a game. And then this past weekend I had to get the house ready for a going to Iraq party for him. That meant repainting most of the house and steam cleaning the floors.
It was all worth it. About 25-30 people showed to send him off. He deploys at the end of next month. Its strange to see my grown son going through all of this stuff. It uses to be that many of his memories I shared with him. Since he has been in the Army for the past year and a bit, he has so many experiences I can't really relate too since I've never been in that situation.
Its weird how they get older how much they are the same child you've always known, but they are growing into their own selves even more so as they venture into this huge world.
All of this has eaten up most of my life. I still carry the same issues: Not enough sex...need more sex...want more sex...and I sometimes just want to fuck. But those are standard issues you've all read before. I think I'm a bit crazy in that department. I was thinking about this the other day about how the simplest of things can really turn me on. I often wonder if it is as common with other men.
The way a woman smells can really drive me wild. Not just perfume, but the usual scent they prefer. I believe researchers relate it back to memory, but damn it gets me wild. I love the softness of a woman's skin. Its almost like silk. My hand can brush up against her arm or leg and I've gone from 0 to 60 in the amount of time my hand starts touching until my brain realizes how soft she is. Sometimes its the way she says my name or the glint in her eyes. And as I've been reminded by many, a small breeze from the south can get me going. I guess it doesn't take me much.
TTFN
cya,
laterz
Thursday, August 30, 2007
The End of Summer
I've been doing some thinking lately. Hey! I saw that collective eye roll. I know that I over analyze my life, but who else's life should I think about? I do think about my kids and other people, but when you have the quiet moments in life and you wonder, what the hell am I doing? It is all about you, baby.
I've been in those type of moods lately. I listened to a radio show about creating goals for your life. You know the kind of thing that makes you list out what you would like to accomplish before you die. I started my list and I hope by the end of the weekend I have compiled a significant list of the things I either want to do, be or get before I become too old or die to realize them. Studies have shown (sorry no link and too lazy to find) that creating goal lists do help you focus on what you want to do. Some people think they are full of shit. I think it is good to have your eye on the prize and realize what you are trying to attain. By attaining that 'goal' I would think your life would become more fulfilling.
This summer has been pretty boring. I usually spend summers doing many things. This summer I've either been short on cash or short on time. This weekend is going to be a simple summary of this summer. I'm going to the ren-faire on Saturday, but I have to be back in town that night. I'm also not really going to have the money nor the time to do what I would really want. Which again has summed up my summer.
Yes I do read and appreciate all the comments. It makes me feel good a few people out there read my drivel from time to time.
cya laterz
moi
I've been in those type of moods lately. I listened to a radio show about creating goals for your life. You know the kind of thing that makes you list out what you would like to accomplish before you die. I started my list and I hope by the end of the weekend I have compiled a significant list of the things I either want to do, be or get before I become too old or die to realize them. Studies have shown (sorry no link and too lazy to find) that creating goal lists do help you focus on what you want to do. Some people think they are full of shit. I think it is good to have your eye on the prize and realize what you are trying to attain. By attaining that 'goal' I would think your life would become more fulfilling.
This summer has been pretty boring. I usually spend summers doing many things. This summer I've either been short on cash or short on time. This weekend is going to be a simple summary of this summer. I'm going to the ren-faire on Saturday, but I have to be back in town that night. I'm also not really going to have the money nor the time to do what I would really want. Which again has summed up my summer.
Yes I do read and appreciate all the comments. It makes me feel good a few people out there read my drivel from time to time.
cya laterz
moi
Thursday, August 09, 2007
Birthday Suicide
It is that time of year...another year older, but I often wonder if I'm getting any wiser. I still enjoy many of the things of my youth, but now my time is consumed by responsibility. I hate that word. Not that I don't mind working, paying bills, and etc. But life usually consists of dealing with money. I get sick of it.
Money then becomes such an issue that every other area of life becomes affected. When you don't have enough money, how can you pay for those lap dances at the club? Er...I didn't say that out loud did I?
Yet the day approaches and I'm often thinking about my death instead of life. Not that I assume I'm going to die nor am I planning too (despite the title of this post). What am I not doing that I want to do? Right now my life is consumed by work and the lack of sex. Yes, if I don't have sex daily, I consider it a lack of sex. Not only am I deprived I'm depraved as well.
What then is the meaning of my life? I'm at a loss for what that means to me. My kids? Writing? Or simply enjoying what I have and not worrying about what I'm missing out on?
BTW: My son found out he is getting deployed to Iraq on Nov 24th. He is going to Baghdad. He says he is coming home for about 10 days or so in October. I'm really nervous about it.
cya laterz
Money then becomes such an issue that every other area of life becomes affected. When you don't have enough money, how can you pay for those lap dances at the club? Er...I didn't say that out loud did I?
Yet the day approaches and I'm often thinking about my death instead of life. Not that I assume I'm going to die nor am I planning too (despite the title of this post). What am I not doing that I want to do? Right now my life is consumed by work and the lack of sex. Yes, if I don't have sex daily, I consider it a lack of sex. Not only am I deprived I'm depraved as well.
What then is the meaning of my life? I'm at a loss for what that means to me. My kids? Writing? Or simply enjoying what I have and not worrying about what I'm missing out on?
BTW: My son found out he is getting deployed to Iraq on Nov 24th. He is going to Baghdad. He says he is coming home for about 10 days or so in October. I'm really nervous about it.
cya laterz
Wednesday, July 25, 2007
Dreaming...
Last night, I didn't sleep all that well. I had the weirdest dreams about two women and manufacturing of some pipe product. I'm sure there is some Freudian statement to be said about that last sentence, but I will let it pass.
One of the things which struck me was they were prostitutes. A blond and a raven haired beauties, but remarkable in that they were very skinny and wore white underwear. The blond girl showed them to me at every opportunity she got. The act of sex cost me $75, but I never really dreamed of the actual act. I did often think about it and how tight her panties stretched across her butt and pussy. I envisioned a lot of camel toe.
Every time I woke up I was excited. Nothing I could do about it and felt very frustrated. When I drifted back to sleep, the dream continued. I worked at a place that manufactured some sort of pipe and I came up with a new product. I hired these girls to help produce it, but they only wanted to work because they wanted to be near me. Everything had a sexual connotation.
I think the dream really means that I'm a pervert and all I do is think about sex.
Some people think that is a bad thing...I'm not sure yet.
cya laterz
One of the things which struck me was they were prostitutes. A blond and a raven haired beauties, but remarkable in that they were very skinny and wore white underwear. The blond girl showed them to me at every opportunity she got. The act of sex cost me $75, but I never really dreamed of the actual act. I did often think about it and how tight her panties stretched across her butt and pussy. I envisioned a lot of camel toe.
Every time I woke up I was excited. Nothing I could do about it and felt very frustrated. When I drifted back to sleep, the dream continued. I worked at a place that manufactured some sort of pipe and I came up with a new product. I hired these girls to help produce it, but they only wanted to work because they wanted to be near me. Everything had a sexual connotation.
I think the dream really means that I'm a pervert and all I do is think about sex.
Some people think that is a bad thing...I'm not sure yet.
cya laterz
Monday, June 04, 2007
Icky Poo
I know its almost been a month since my last post. I haven't felt so keen about posting. In truth I haven't had much to look forward too except for issues and problems.
I'm seriously thinking of giving up my software business. This is going to kill me. I know I can do the work, its just that work is too far and few between right now. In the past six months, every time I feel like I have landed a large contract, it either drags on forever or the interest vanishes.
I've been approved for a large contract this month, ($40,000 or so) and another $4,000 in July. I might have another job worth around $10,000 in the next few weeks. And the proposal I did in Feb/March with the company in Florida is still up in the air. That would be worth around $20,000. If...and that is a big IF they all came in this week I'd be saved. Of course I'd need another potential customer or two in the next month or so to start the long process as well. It seems to take a year to get anything big going. The smaller jobs are nice, but only if I have other means of income coming along the way.
I feel like I'm losing everything and I can't grab onto one specific thing. Nothing is exempt from my life as far as confusion and utter hopelessness is concerned. I often feel like I make one mistake after the other trying to fix it. It seems as if I clean up the shit in one room only to track into the rest of the house.
I wonder what I should do. I can't even think straight any more. I don't even know who to talk to get my head on straight. I thought things were supposed to be easier as you get older. It gets worse...at least for me. I'm tired of myself and the decisions I make. And now I put off making decisions and it is hurting me.
cya laterz
I'm seriously thinking of giving up my software business. This is going to kill me. I know I can do the work, its just that work is too far and few between right now. In the past six months, every time I feel like I have landed a large contract, it either drags on forever or the interest vanishes.
I've been approved for a large contract this month, ($40,000 or so) and another $4,000 in July. I might have another job worth around $10,000 in the next few weeks. And the proposal I did in Feb/March with the company in Florida is still up in the air. That would be worth around $20,000. If...and that is a big IF they all came in this week I'd be saved. Of course I'd need another potential customer or two in the next month or so to start the long process as well. It seems to take a year to get anything big going. The smaller jobs are nice, but only if I have other means of income coming along the way.
I feel like I'm losing everything and I can't grab onto one specific thing. Nothing is exempt from my life as far as confusion and utter hopelessness is concerned. I often feel like I make one mistake after the other trying to fix it. It seems as if I clean up the shit in one room only to track into the rest of the house.
I wonder what I should do. I can't even think straight any more. I don't even know who to talk to get my head on straight. I thought things were supposed to be easier as you get older. It gets worse...at least for me. I'm tired of myself and the decisions I make. And now I put off making decisions and it is hurting me.
cya laterz
Saturday, May 05, 2007
Threequels
This summer boasts many returns to the big screen in part three of who knows how many. Last night I saw the first of the many blockbusters that are due out this summer, Spidey 3. I have a mixed reaction to the movie. I think it dragged on a bit playing out the whole Mary Jane and Peter Parker relationship, but it was neat to see that in the end the three friends were together.
I also have to be reminded that it is based on a comic book. Sometimes trying to be too true to the comic can make it corny at times. I cringed at some of the other actors in the movie. Especially when the news team gave 'live' reports.
The guy who plays Sandman got buff for the movie. I remember him on Wings a LONG time ago and he was pretty scrawny. He has some muscle in his arms for this movie. Then again it could be visually enhanced.
All in all I didn't feel cheated for the money I paid. It wasn't the be all, end all movie, but it was a good time. And the humor they added from time to time helped as well although I did like the 'bad' Peter Parker than the overly nice guy. Heh.
Shriek 3 and Pirates is coming out yet this month. I'm really looking forward to Pirates and if the trailer they played was any indication, the audience applauded for it. I think that's going to be the 'BIG' movie this summer. That is if they can pull it off. We are thinking of dressing up in our pirate duds for that movie. Although I don't know if I can sit in a movie seat with my sword stretched out in front of me. (Quiet you with the dirty minds!)
cya laterz
moi
I also have to be reminded that it is based on a comic book. Sometimes trying to be too true to the comic can make it corny at times. I cringed at some of the other actors in the movie. Especially when the news team gave 'live' reports.
The guy who plays Sandman got buff for the movie. I remember him on Wings a LONG time ago and he was pretty scrawny. He has some muscle in his arms for this movie. Then again it could be visually enhanced.
All in all I didn't feel cheated for the money I paid. It wasn't the be all, end all movie, but it was a good time. And the humor they added from time to time helped as well although I did like the 'bad' Peter Parker than the overly nice guy. Heh.
Shriek 3 and Pirates is coming out yet this month. I'm really looking forward to Pirates and if the trailer they played was any indication, the audience applauded for it. I think that's going to be the 'BIG' movie this summer. That is if they can pull it off. We are thinking of dressing up in our pirate duds for that movie. Although I don't know if I can sit in a movie seat with my sword stretched out in front of me. (Quiet you with the dirty minds!)
cya laterz
moi
Wednesday, April 25, 2007
The price of life
What is the price of a human life? Do the residents of a certain country or culture assume to value life higher than another? When the tragic events at Virgina Tech rippled through this country we were all shocked and horrified that someone could be that insane to do something so terrible. As a nation we were outraged that one man could kill over thirty people and injure a couple of dozen of others. We wanted answers, justice and the ability to stop anyone else that might attempt such a heinous act again.
Yet in other parts of the world, war, famine and other senseless acts of violence happen on a daily basis. When we read that over three hundred people died in a car bombing or thousands of people in Africa are getting slaughtered for their heritage or beliefs we yawn, turn the channel to see what the weather will be like and sip on our coffee. But in the back of our minds we really wonder if gas prices are going up again.
We can't get involved, its not our country or our people, so its not our problem. However, when that country has natural resources we canexploit use, we are eager to pony up money, manpower and all the rest of our resources to make it right. No matter which side of the political fence you sit upon it should make you sick that people are persecuted for a variety of reasons.
We try to teach our children to do the right thing. In a household with many children, you expect the older kids to lead by example, but what nation is leading by example in our world today? It isn't about doing the right thing, it is all about protecting interests. Treating people with respect and dignity is clearly towards the bottom of our list of priorities. Watching innocent people suffer and die is okay because it is none of our business.
Hotel Rwanda
The Last King of Scottland
Watch these two movies back to back and then go to any of your favorite news sites cnn.com, foxnews.com, msnbc.com and check the world news. Somewhere in the world some extreme act of violence has taken place. There are THOUSANDS of acts of violence towards humanity going on that are NOT getting reported. Check this out happening in North Korea (link may go underground soon). People are persecuted for race, religion and anything else because someone in power doesn't like that about them.
We Americans think we have evolved as a society. Social rights have been extended to many Americans and we often scorn those who deny liberties to minorities. Yet still some things have yet to become obsolete. Check this link out about a school in Georgia. We have not gone very far in this country to think we can ignore the events in the rest of the world. We offer the same injustices, the same prejudices and the same hatred for one another. Its no wonder we don't care what happens to people thousands of miles away when our own people are treated with disrespect.
cya laterz
moi
Yet in other parts of the world, war, famine and other senseless acts of violence happen on a daily basis. When we read that over three hundred people died in a car bombing or thousands of people in Africa are getting slaughtered for their heritage or beliefs we yawn, turn the channel to see what the weather will be like and sip on our coffee. But in the back of our minds we really wonder if gas prices are going up again.
We can't get involved, its not our country or our people, so its not our problem. However, when that country has natural resources we can
We try to teach our children to do the right thing. In a household with many children, you expect the older kids to lead by example, but what nation is leading by example in our world today? It isn't about doing the right thing, it is all about protecting interests. Treating people with respect and dignity is clearly towards the bottom of our list of priorities. Watching innocent people suffer and die is okay because it is none of our business.
Hotel Rwanda
The Last King of Scottland
Watch these two movies back to back and then go to any of your favorite news sites cnn.com, foxnews.com, msnbc.com and check the world news. Somewhere in the world some extreme act of violence has taken place. There are THOUSANDS of acts of violence towards humanity going on that are NOT getting reported. Check this out happening in North Korea (link may go underground soon). People are persecuted for race, religion and anything else because someone in power doesn't like that about them.
We Americans think we have evolved as a society. Social rights have been extended to many Americans and we often scorn those who deny liberties to minorities. Yet still some things have yet to become obsolete. Check this link out about a school in Georgia. We have not gone very far in this country to think we can ignore the events in the rest of the world. We offer the same injustices, the same prejudices and the same hatred for one another. Its no wonder we don't care what happens to people thousands of miles away when our own people are treated with disrespect.
cya laterz
moi
Saturday, April 21, 2007
The Life
I learned something last week about my writing over the past couple of weeks. Idea driven stories suck. I also realize I'm in too much of a hurry to get my work "seen" and I lose a lot of details when I do that.
For my next project I'm thinking I need to find someone who I can write about and write his or her story. Imagining a scene and then trying to introduce the characters leaves the plot and the emotion flat.
This brings me to my next topic, I usually know what is 'right' or 'wrong' with my stories when I post/give them to people to read. When I get honest feedback I rarely get a criticism or an atta boy that I didn't expect. It is my job then to pour over the items I already know are weak and fix them. Often I'm in such a hurry to be 'read' that I don't take the time to fix these and other minor things and the story falls flat before it really has a chance.
So I need to make the resolve of slowing down and dissecting each line in my post-edit mode. One thing I have often read is that I should let the story sit for a few weeks and then go back and reread/edit it. It become fresher and I'm not caught up in the emotion of writing it. I don't tend to do that because of my limited amount of work. The idea then is to get into a cycle of writing. Where I would write a short story, put it aside for a while and then start a new story. Maybe after I wrote the next story or two go back and edit the first one. Write another story then edit the second one and then polish the first one again. This process would accomplish tow things for me. Writing more and producing quality work when I do throw it to the wolves, er readers.
On a side note, thank God it is spring. We had a taste of it a couple of weeks ago, but then it turn cold and snowy. After a couple of weeks of miserable weather, the last few days have been beautiful.
cya laterz
me
For my next project I'm thinking I need to find someone who I can write about and write his or her story. Imagining a scene and then trying to introduce the characters leaves the plot and the emotion flat.
This brings me to my next topic, I usually know what is 'right' or 'wrong' with my stories when I post/give them to people to read. When I get honest feedback I rarely get a criticism or an atta boy that I didn't expect. It is my job then to pour over the items I already know are weak and fix them. Often I'm in such a hurry to be 'read' that I don't take the time to fix these and other minor things and the story falls flat before it really has a chance.
So I need to make the resolve of slowing down and dissecting each line in my post-edit mode. One thing I have often read is that I should let the story sit for a few weeks and then go back and reread/edit it. It become fresher and I'm not caught up in the emotion of writing it. I don't tend to do that because of my limited amount of work. The idea then is to get into a cycle of writing. Where I would write a short story, put it aside for a while and then start a new story. Maybe after I wrote the next story or two go back and edit the first one. Write another story then edit the second one and then polish the first one again. This process would accomplish tow things for me. Writing more and producing quality work when I do throw it to the wolves, er readers.
On a side note, thank God it is spring. We had a taste of it a couple of weeks ago, but then it turn cold and snowy. After a couple of weeks of miserable weather, the last few days have been beautiful.
cya laterz
me
Saturday, April 14, 2007
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